Tuesday, May 5, 2009


So, these two birds are trying to make a house in my garage. That’s not going to work because that is where my cat’s house is. Whenever the overhead door is open they fly in with nesting materials and head over to the corner and start tucking away. Then the door closes and they freak out and start flying in circles and crashing into the windows. The cat thinks it’s awesome. I heard crashing and banging in there one morning so I peeked in the window to see what the hell was going on before I ventured in. The cat was jumping from the cab of one pick-up to the other trying to catch these crazy birds. His claws were screeching along the paint, the birds were chirping like mad, there were feathers everywhere. So I open the door, the birds fly out and the cat pounces on me from the top of the truck, purring like a (giant, deranged) kitten. He was all kinds of fired up from the chase. So the next morning I go out to feed the pets and guess who’s back in there. Birds. Only now, when I open the people door they try to dive bomb me! I almost lost an eye! They flew around me in a whirlwind of birdy adrenaline, chirping and sailing through the air, it was very nerve wracking. My mind was racing. Am I going to get pecked to death? Will I die with bird poop in my hair? HOW IS THIS ALL GOING TO END!? Well, they flew off and I bought a fake owl to scare them away in the future and hung it up in the corner of the garage. The end.

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